Wet Mess
Cats don't care if other cats are gay. Too bad the same can't be said for humans. Even Skitters the Cat couldn't cheer up Taj when he got outed by a frenemie. Today on Quirky Cat Nips, we're airing Chapter 15 of Quirky Cat Gets Ghosted in our ongoing presentation of this hilarious audiobook. Meow Kitties!
Listen to Episode #28 Now:
Transcript:
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Announcer: This is Pet Life Radio.
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Announcer: Let's talk pets.
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Announcer: Cat lovers and feline friends, it's time for Adele Park's Quirky Cat Nips.
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My kitten has a drinking problem.
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Allison, my Siberian mackerel, is seemingly unable to take a drink of water without soaking the fur on her neck.
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I fondly refer to this portion of Allison's body as an ascot, since it's white, long and rather regal.
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Oh, quit judging on the ascot thing.
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You probably have a cat named Luke Skywhiskers or Charles Lickens.
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Anyway, being one of those suckers who believes everything they read on the internet, I got Allison a stainless steel water dish.
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It's a shallow pan about the size of a dessert plate.
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Allison must think the water on the other side of the bowl is more delicious because she stretches her entire neck across it just to take a drink.
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As a result, Allison's white ascot gets totally soaked.
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It looks like some kind of hideous hair meringue when it finally dries.
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As an experiment, I substituted Allison's normal water dish for a bowl that was smaller in circumference but a lot deeper.
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Allison puts everything to the smell test so she stretched across the new bowl and baptized her ascot as she was examining the other side.
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I don't know why Allison wants to drink out of something that has been steeped in the dregs of her own fur.
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Although put into perspective, she also licks her own butt.
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You might think this sort of slushy behavior at the watering hole would carry over to Allison's food dish, but in reality, she is a meticulous eater.
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Allison has this no kibble left behind policy, whereby she eats any errant piece of chow that may have found its way outside the dish before she takes on the main attraction.
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If your cat is a chronic ascot wetter, you could try using a smaller water dish.
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Or you could just put up with your pretty little kitty sporting waddles of stiff neck fur jutting out like Guy Fieri's hairdo.
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Can't wait to hear the rest of Quirky Cat Gets Ghosted by Adele Park?
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Get ghosted today on Audible, Spotify and Barnes and Noble.
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Announcer: Meow, bitches.
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Announcer: I really don't like audio books, but this one kicks ass.
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Announcer: Let's Talk Pets, every week, on demand.
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Announcer: Only on petliferadio.com.