Chapter 13 Ghosted
Skitters the Cat is used to dealing with ghosts, but humans who pretend to be ghosts? Skitters may have been born in the dark, but it wasn't last night! Today on Quirky Cat Nips, we're airing Chapter 13 of Quirky Cat Gets Ghosted in our ongoing presentation of this hilarious audiobook. Meow Kitties!
Listen to Episode #23 Now:
Transcript:
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Announcer: This is Pet Life Radio.
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Announcer: Let's talk pets.
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Announcer: Cat lovers and feline friends, it's time for Adele Park's Quirky Cat Nips.
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Announcer: Today on the Quirky Cat Nips Podcast, we're airing a chapter of Quirky Cat Gets Ghosted, which we will do until the entire audio book has been broadcasted.
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Announcer: We invite all you kitties to kick back now, relax and enjoy Quirky Cat Gets Ghosted by Adele Park.
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Announcer: Audio Recording St.
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Announcer: George Presents Quirky Cat Gets Ghosted Written, produced, and edited by Adele Park Narrated by a full cast.
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A cast.
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A Directive from Gertrude Fletcher, Head of the Naval Utah Department of Motor Vehicles, Part 13.
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Growing up, we were left to our own devices when it came to keeping ourselves entertained.
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We weren't burdened with all the noisy gadgets and computer games that kids today are seemingly obsessed with.
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One of my favorite pastimes was the, you're getting warmer, you're getting colder game.
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Someone would hide a thimble or other small object in our cramped house and tell us if we were getting close to finding it by saying, you're getting warmer.
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Finally, someone is getting warmer when it comes to learning about what is happening to my shivering ward of a ghost, Blue McKenna.
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Although Blue's twin moon is unable to detect her, she has at last stumbled upon the first clue.
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Moon doesn't strike me as someone who does a lot of critical thinking.
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She would never make it as a bureaucrat.
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Moon can't even remember to keep her driver's license current.
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Honestly, I don't understand people like this.
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Nonetheless, we'll have to work with what we have.
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Although preoccupied with her personal life, Moon was able to suss out the one factor which has thus far escaped everyone's attention, Delphina Fletcher, Boyd's grandmother.
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Delphina was a complex character, equal parts lady of the mansion and street savvy survivor.
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She was highly skilled.
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All the Fletchers are.
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Building is in their blood, not just trusses, but intricate cabinetry and ornamental garnishments.
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The original house at Juniper Hollow had already been burned to the ground when I married Boyd, but he still had some of the blueprints.
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In the days when navel was first being settled, most of the citizenry was hiding from the Mormon Church.
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They had gone rogue, abandoning the mission they had been sent to complete.
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Instead, establishing their own community where they lived in seclusion for decades.
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The only bank in town at the time, in God We Trust, wasn't even backed by the FDIC.
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As a result, many navalites stashed their money at home, developing hidden compartments and nooks.
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No one was more adept at this than the Fletchers.
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Delfina became an expert craftsman, designing many of the features at Juniper Hollow, including some of its yet undiscovered hiding places.
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Next!
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In case you haven't noticed, you've been ghosted.
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Announcer: Chapter 13, Moon McKenna It began with a drunken Fuck Me Friday and slid into a Feel Sorry For Me Sex Sunday.
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Announcer: Perhaps the white swimming suit had something to do with it.
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Announcer: I wasn't trying to copy Blue's Come Hither Bikini, the white one with the turquoise embellishments.
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Announcer: I just happened to be shopping online when an eye-popping suit jumped out from my screen.
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Announcer: This particular bikini had a layer of eyelet lace, so it was slightly different from Blue's anyway.
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Announcer: Not in the cut, but that's not my fault.
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Announcer: I just needed a stupid swimming suit.
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Announcer: All the meals at Legacy Grove were beginning to coat my thighs, prompting me to perform excessive daily laps in my pool.
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Announcer: If I was going to lose my husband to another man, I was going to look damn good doing it.
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Announcer: The white swimsuit didn't go unnoticed by Scotty Sphincter.
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Announcer: He comes over a lot with Rudy to practice the lessons from the mom-and-taught class that Tosh is teaching.
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Announcer: Scotty is a miserable widower, but he relishes being the only dad in that class.
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Announcer: One white bikini doesn't make me an imposter.
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Announcer: And I didn't buy the white boots I looked at.
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Announcer: They kept appearing on my you might also like option, however, so I haven't ruled that out entirely.
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Announcer: As for riding my ATV more than using my car, well, that just makes good environmental sense.
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Announcer: Not because I'm trying to fill those white boots left behind by blue.
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Announcer: I can shave several miles off the trip from Gecko's Gulch to Legacy Grove if I cut across the desert on my ATV.
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Announcer: My SUV could make it, but why rattle the transmission any more than I need to?
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Announcer: Besides, it was just me these days.
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Announcer: The car seats for my kids are still in there, which makes me sad and pathetic because they're too old to use them now.
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Announcer: Randall took over driving the girls to school in the days following Blue's death.
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Announcer: I barely left the house at all and had zero motivation to remove the car seats.
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Announcer: Transportation isn't the only habit of Blue's that I'm mimicking.
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Announcer: My hair is almost as long as hers was.
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Announcer: It started by my unwillingness to show up at the best little hair house in Naval.
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Announcer: My husband Randall refuses to style anyone outside of the salon.
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Announcer: I get that.
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Announcer: All his stuff is there.
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Announcer: I just couldn't bring myself to appear in public if I didn't have to.
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Announcer: All those looks of pity from the well-meaning citizenry of Naval was just too much.
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Announcer: So I let my hair grow.
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Announcer: Now I'm well on my way to looking like Cousin It from the Addams Family, especially since my bangs have gotten to the stage where they're right in my eyes.
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Announcer: At night, I pin them up so they don't tickle me while I sleep.
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Announcer: The rest of the time, I use them to hide.
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Announcer: Things got worse when everyone left for the summer.
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Announcer: No one seems to miss me a bit.
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Announcer: Even the goddamn cat has moved out.
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Announcer: The twins are rightfully enjoying summer camp.
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Announcer: Randall is busy simultaneously frolicking with his new boyfriend and waging war with the voters in California.
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Announcer: Much to our collective dismay, the citizens of California heralded in a new wave of intolerance by passing Proposition 8, aka Prop Hate.
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Announcer: This bigoted law bans same-sex marriage in the state most likely to accept such arrangements.
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Announcer: The really confounding thing is, California voters took the hand they used to elect the nation's first black president to slap gay people across the face.
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Announcer: Where is the disconnect?
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Announcer: Randall's new boy toy is all over this situation, rabble rousing on a rather frightening level.
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Announcer: I agree with his position, but I'm not willing to drink the Kool-Aid like Randall.
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Announcer: What truly worries me is said boyfriend wants to push the boundaries of Prop 8 by getting married to my husband.
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Announcer: Yeah, I know.
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Announcer: Seems super unfair.
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Announcer: Randall keeps telling me, it's not personal.
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Announcer: I'm fighting for us.
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Announcer: No, Randall, my dearest, you are fighting against us.
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Announcer: You might be wondering why a lesbian would give two shakes about who her gay husband is schnockering.
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Announcer: In reality, Randall and I have a very deep love for each other, almost as much as we have for our children.
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Announcer: The only way I can be part of their lives now is to move to California.
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Announcer: All this over a homophobic slur delivered by a grade school kid who probably didn't even know what he was talking about.
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Announcer: The thought of Randall divorcing me in his fight for equality turns my stomach.
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Announcer: What Randall fails to recognize is you can't outrun discrimination.
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Announcer: Not to mention the irony of choosing the state that just legalized it as a place to settle.
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Announcer: Prop 8 is bringing the haters out of the closet in an attempt to shove gay people back in it.
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Announcer: The only thing relocating to California would accomplish is a guaranteed traffic jam.
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Announcer: Have you ever tried to drive there?
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Announcer: It's a freaking nightmare in slow motion.
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Announcer: I had a dream the other night about getting stuck in traffic while trying to drive the twins to school.
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Announcer: This isn't something you can wake up from in California.
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Announcer: It's everyday life in the Golden State.
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Announcer: I'm hoping the obscene housing prices will deal the final death blow to Randall's plans to repatriate our family.
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Announcer: So far, an extremely frustrating remodel at the Smoot family ranch is keeping Randall too busy to go house hunting.
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Announcer: With any luck at all, we'll be priced out of the market, despite the glut of money Randall is getting from selling out to his brothers.
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Announcer: Hang tight, kitties.
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Announcer: We'll be back in a scratch.
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Announcer: What's more quirky than cannabis?
00:10:29.949 --> 00:10:33.429
Announcer: A reality TV show where everyone is half-baked.
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Announcer: Quirky Cannabis Country by Adele Park is a trip you'll never forget.
00:10:39.569 --> 00:10:42.969
Announcer: Get Quirky Cannabis Country today on audible.com.
00:10:43.729 --> 00:10:45.169
Announcer: Quirky Cannabis Country.
00:10:45.629 --> 00:10:49.189
Announcer: Snag your copy before the whole place goes up in smoke.
00:10:51.749 --> 00:10:53.689
Announcer: Take a bite out of your competition.
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Announcer: Pet Life Radio.
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Announcer: My job this summer is to get Gecko's Gulch ready to sell.
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Announcer: So far I haven't done a darn thing.
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Announcer: In fact, I've been sprucing up the twins' bedroom, buying new curtains, throw rugs, and bedspreads.
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Announcer: They're a gaudy combination of pink and purple girly stuff.
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Announcer: Not my taste, but sure to please the twins.
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Announcer: Now I'm thinking I should paint one wall an accent color.
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Announcer: Maybe lilac?
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Announcer: I have a stack of paint swaths I like to thumb through whenever I'm lonely, which is a lot.
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Announcer: Needless to say, I'm suffocating in the absence of Randall and the twins.
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Announcer: When Blue died, it was like the universe decided to take everyone else I cared about, too.
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Announcer: Having skitters move out was a real kick in the teeth, never mind the fact that I can barely tolerate that tubby lint collector.
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Announcer: Perhaps this is why it was so easy to hook up with Scotty.
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Announcer: That, and a healthy dose of Cabernet Sauvignon.
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Announcer: I don't normally drink a lot, so healthy is a terrible way to describe what happened.
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Announcer: Grevious amounts of Cabernet Sauvignon is far more accurate.
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Announcer: It started out innocently enough.
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Announcer: I was hungry, literally.
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Announcer: I don't keep much food in the house and have little interest in driving to Naval for provisions.
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Announcer: Taj was around so I knew for sure there was chow at Legacy Grove, and plenty of it.
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Announcer: My god, that kid can eat.
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Announcer: Blue never had any qualms about relying on Taj to keep her fed, so I thought, why not?
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Announcer: Everyone acted like it was perfectly normal when I started showing up around supper time.
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Announcer: Besides Taj's culinary magic, Scotty does a fantastic job with the three or four things he knows how to make.
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Announcer: It was the Friday night food that got me into trouble.
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Announcer: That's when I'm supposed to supply dinner.
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Announcer: I rarely ever cook.
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Announcer: What I'm able to come up with generally isn't edible.
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Announcer: Fast Food to the Rescue The boys hardly ever make it to Gecko's Gulch for the takeout food I get from Our Daily Bread or Moroni and Cheese on Friday nights.
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Announcer: Of course, it's always cold by the time I drive home.
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Announcer: I'm not even skilled with the microwave, thus ruining every meal.
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Announcer: That's not why the boys don't come, however.
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Announcer: They just have teenage stuff to do, even in a small town like Naval.
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Announcer: Scotty arrives with Rudy already nodding off for the evening.
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Announcer: We set the little tyke in his playpen until he conks out for good.
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Announcer: Scotty gamely eats the mushy reheated noodles or soggy soup bowls, and then we have wine for dessert.
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Announcer: Lots of it.
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Announcer: Not on purpose.
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Announcer: It was just something to sip while we talked.
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Announcer: For hours.
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Announcer: I looked forward to these meals with just the two of us on the patio, watching the sun melt into the horizon, amethyst red and tangerine orange.
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Announcer: Sunset in the desert is sacred.
00:14:47.129 --> 00:14:49.569
Announcer: I don't know who kissed who first.
00:14:50.049 --> 00:14:55.069
Announcer: I do know that we went from first base to a home run in about 90 seconds.
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Announcer: Not kidding here.
00:14:57.289 --> 00:15:00.329
Announcer: It was the fastest sex in the history of humans.
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Announcer: My impression was that it was great.
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Announcer: Oh, get over yourself.
00:15:05.389 --> 00:15:11.469
Announcer: Just because I'm a lictolotipus doesn't mean I don't enjoy a good rogering from time to time.
00:15:12.009 --> 00:15:15.209
Announcer: Mostly, though, it was the after coitus cuddle.
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Announcer: That used to be Randall's job, minus the aforementioned rogering.
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Announcer: Gay men are the best when it comes to schmoodling, not to mention the rapt interest they take in pillow talk.
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Announcer: On this last point, Scotty behaved like a stereotypical man, drifting off into a semi-drunk sleep seconds after the big moment.
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Announcer: I woke up the next morning feeling like a piece of dog crap that's been stepped in more than once.
00:15:43.489 --> 00:15:48.989
Announcer: I spent the day in bed, rising only to rehydrate all the tears of guilt I cried.
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Announcer: By Sunday, I resolved to apologize to Scotty and spend the remainder of my days in atonement for boffing my sister's husband.
00:15:57.929 --> 00:16:02.749
Announcer: First, though, I had to identify this feeling I got whenever I was around Scotty.
00:16:03.089 --> 00:16:06.809
Announcer: He took it to mean round two of the TNA tango.
00:16:07.349 --> 00:16:08.249
Announcer: Oh, what the hell!
00:16:08.769 --> 00:16:14.149
Announcer: I went along for the ride, curious to see where this windowless van was taking me next.
00:16:14.609 --> 00:16:15.709
Announcer: Not to the top.
00:16:16.089 --> 00:16:17.909
Announcer: Men just don't know what to do.
00:16:18.389 --> 00:16:26.929
Announcer: I fled in horror afterwards, yelling over my shoulder to Scotty that I was a terrible sister, which I assume he already knew.
00:16:26.949 --> 00:16:29.369
Announcer: I arrived at the Oasis on autopilot.
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Announcer: This was Blue's old haunt, back in the days when she grew weed for a living.
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Announcer: Blue, are you here?
00:16:36.889 --> 00:16:45.649
Announcer: I called, stupidly expecting her to rise up among the thicket of colorful foliage like a phoenix fleeing the fires of hell.
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Announcer: I hadn't been in the Oasis since she died.
00:16:49.129 --> 00:16:56.089
Announcer: With the closure of my skincare company, I no longer needed to harvest certain ingredients unique to the Oasis.
00:16:56.609 --> 00:17:03.269
Announcer: I careened through the vegetation, cursing myself for sledding around with my dead sister's husband.
00:17:03.729 --> 00:17:08.909
Announcer: I wasn't surprised when I encountered a marijuana grow site, just disappointed.
00:17:09.389 --> 00:17:16.349
Announcer: Back in the days when my sister was known as Bong Hit Blue, most of her supply originated from the Oasis.
00:17:16.929 --> 00:17:20.469
Announcer: What I saw today looked like the handiwork of amateurs.
00:17:21.489 --> 00:17:24.009
Announcer: Lord, what are these boys thinking?
00:17:24.629 --> 00:17:28.349
Announcer: Certainly not about the prison bum beef they could soon become.
00:17:28.949 --> 00:17:29.989
Announcer: I needed proof.
00:17:30.689 --> 00:17:35.109
Announcer: I waited until Tuesday afternoon when everyone was gone from Legacy Grove.
00:17:35.689 --> 00:17:39.189
Announcer: I have a key so it's not like I was breaking and entering.
00:17:39.649 --> 00:17:42.409
Announcer: The first thing I searched was Blue's writing nook.
00:17:42.909 --> 00:17:48.729
Announcer: Taj was now sleeping on the futon, with his belongings neatly stacked on the shelves in the closet.
00:17:49.369 --> 00:17:54.529
Announcer: Blue's bag was sitting on the desk, presumably where someone had put it many months ago.
00:17:54.949 --> 00:17:59.969
Announcer: I pawed through it, looking for the photo album that surely played a role in her death.
00:18:00.389 --> 00:18:01.129
Announcer: It was gone.
00:18:01.629 --> 00:18:03.889
Announcer: Annoying but not a disaster.
00:18:04.429 --> 00:18:07.249
Announcer: I had copies of everything on my laptop.
00:18:07.629 --> 00:18:15.669
Announcer: Besides drug contraband, I was looking for the thumb drive that contained the book that Blue was working on, the one about Juniper Hollow.
00:18:16.309 --> 00:18:18.409
Announcer: I knew just where to find it, too.
00:18:18.749 --> 00:18:23.189
Announcer: Legacy Grove was built by Joseph Stratton, the founding father of Naval.
00:18:23.649 --> 00:18:32.349
Announcer: One of his 22 wives had lived here alone, slowly driving herself crazy by ingesting Belladonna for its hallucinogenic properties.
00:18:32.929 --> 00:18:37.789
Announcer: Fueled by paranoia, a number of secret compartments were installed in the house.
00:18:38.329 --> 00:18:42.169
Announcer: One of them is in the closet of what is now called Blue's writing nook.
00:18:42.809 --> 00:18:47.529
Announcer: Sure enough, the thumb drive was in there, the only item in the cubby hole.
00:18:48.049 --> 00:18:53.429
Announcer: Everything about the original construction of Legacy Grove was grossly over the top.
00:18:53.829 --> 00:19:01.209
Announcer: From the fancy balusters on the stairways to the crown molding, the house was built with remarkable craftsmanship.
00:19:01.589 --> 00:19:10.749
Announcer: The butler's pantry in the kitchen was wallpapered so cleverly that, were it not for the door handle, it would blend in perfectly with the rest of the kitchen.
00:19:11.389 --> 00:19:21.349
Announcer: Both remodels of Legacy Grove, the one done by my husband when he owned it, and the more recent one overseen by Blue and Scotty, preserved this feature.
00:19:21.789 --> 00:19:27.929
Announcer: Due to its lack of wear and tear, the closet in the nook still had its original wallpaper.
00:19:28.389 --> 00:19:32.789
Announcer: Whether Blue told Scotty about the secret compartment in the closet is unknown.
00:19:33.529 --> 00:19:38.649
Announcer: I certainly won't bring it to his attention, especially since I swiped the thumb drive.
00:19:39.149 --> 00:19:41.849
Announcer: Relieved, I hadn't found any weed so far.
00:19:42.249 --> 00:19:46.989
Announcer: I headed out to the glorified packing shed that Brandon is currently befouling.
00:19:47.309 --> 00:19:51.669
Announcer: The place smelled like boiled cabbage simmering in raw sewage.
00:19:52.049 --> 00:20:07.069
Announcer: Opening the door, I was assaulted with a blast of residual stink from fast food wrappers, half full milk glasses on the way to forming cottage cheese, and jeans so stiff they could walk out on their own.
00:20:07.709 --> 00:20:08.149
Announcer: Wow!
00:20:08.769 --> 00:20:12.389
Announcer: I know kids smell, but this was unreal.
00:20:12.869 --> 00:20:19.049
Announcer: I held my nose and dug in, searching cabinets, storage closets, even the bathroom.
00:20:19.549 --> 00:20:27.129
Announcer: The only semi-incriminating evidence I could find was a stack of new pizza boxes from a place called Oasis Pie.
00:20:27.649 --> 00:20:29.169
Announcer: Why would Brandon have these?
00:20:29.709 --> 00:20:32.749
Announcer: Was he planning to make pizzas in the brick oven and sell them?
00:20:33.209 --> 00:20:34.469
Announcer: I looked at the label again.
00:20:35.069 --> 00:20:36.809
Announcer: It had a Vegas address.
00:20:37.309 --> 00:20:39.989
Announcer: Not knowing what this meant, I moved on.
00:20:40.529 --> 00:20:46.289
Announcer: As I was rummaging around in the bathroom, a voice nearly startled me out of my skin.
00:20:46.769 --> 00:20:49.529
Announcer: It was Scotty, asking what I was doing.
00:20:50.469 --> 00:20:50.869
>Shit!
00:20:51.289 --> 00:20:52.509
Announcer: He was home early.
00:20:53.089 --> 00:21:01.429
Announcer: Feeling guilty about the intrusion, not to mention the whole sex with my sister's widower thing, I blurted out, I found a grow site.
00:21:02.309 --> 00:21:04.929
Announcer: I wanted to make sure the boys weren't involved.
00:21:05.329 --> 00:21:09.089
Announcer: Scotty looked a little stunned for a moment, then pitched in to help.
00:21:09.529 --> 00:21:13.749
Announcer: He searched the cupboards in the kitchen area while I looked through the refrigerator.
00:21:14.169 --> 00:21:15.489
Announcer: Nothing of interest here.
00:21:15.989 --> 00:21:23.469
Announcer: The fridge was filled with Rowdy's Righteous Root Beer, half a loaf of moldy bread, and an assortment of random condiments.
00:21:23.929 --> 00:21:28.509
Announcer: The freezer was crammed with teenage staples like fish sticks and toaster pastries.
00:21:29.289 --> 00:21:35.769
Announcer: I breathed a sigh of relief, grateful I hadn't come across any sign the boys were running a drug cartel.
00:21:36.249 --> 00:21:42.869
Announcer: Scotty wasn't so sure, pointing out that whoever was growing ganja in the oasis needed to be stopped.
00:21:43.389 --> 00:21:46.769
Announcer: Simply destroying the existing crop wasn't enough.
00:21:47.429 --> 00:21:52.949
Announcer: I know from personal experience, things grow in the oasis with uncanny speed.
00:21:53.409 --> 00:22:00.369
Announcer: The better plan was to mark the area as hollowed ground and scare the hair follicles off anyone who dared to enter.
00:22:00.849 --> 00:22:05.749
Announcer: As someone who was born on Halloween, I've become a master ghoster.
00:22:06.349 --> 00:22:08.829
Announcer: I can put the scare on with the best of them.
00:22:09.309 --> 00:22:22.969
Announcer: This being Scotty's favorite holiday, combined with his experience with costumes and props, made the assignment so exciting, for a moment we both forgot what dirty, cheating wankers we'd become.
00:22:23.629 --> 00:22:29.169
Announcer: In fact, Scotty was displaying more signs of enthusiasm than he had since Blue died.
00:22:29.489 --> 00:22:34.829
Announcer: Growing up, my parents insisted on a big to-do for our Halloween birthdays.
00:22:35.249 --> 00:22:51.149
Announcer: They'd be decked the entire yard with gauzy ghosts caught in the branches of the trees, creepy cutouts of ghouls peeping through the windows, a crazy witch on a bike mounted on top of the garden shed, and a platoon of scarecrows.
00:22:51.969 --> 00:22:58.849
Announcer: One year, when we were still quite young, our father used chicken wire to make a full-sized ghost bride.
00:22:59.269 --> 00:23:07.869
Announcer: Dad spray painted it with streaks of gray, emphasizing the 3D look while still maintaining the unsettling see-through quality.
00:23:08.449 --> 00:23:13.789
Announcer: It was so freaky, blue wouldn't go in the yard, not even during the day.
00:23:14.269 --> 00:23:17.289
Announcer: Premonition or just weird coincidence?
00:23:17.949 --> 00:23:18.729
Announcer: Didn't matter.
00:23:19.389 --> 00:23:23.869
Announcer: That thing horrified blue and left me feeling uneasy as well.
00:23:24.409 --> 00:23:28.769
Announcer: Our parents finally removed it and never made another sculpture like it.
00:23:29.449 --> 00:23:38.969
Announcer: Blue continued the all-out Halloween tradition until she died, crafting every kind of boogeyman imaginable, but nothing with chicken wire.
00:23:39.589 --> 00:23:44.929
Announcer: I was certain Brandon and Taj had never seen anything like that shuddersome phantom bride.
00:23:45.909 --> 00:23:53.029
Announcer: Nonetheless, I didn't think they'd fall for the illusion during the day, even in a place as ominous as the Oasis.
00:23:53.709 --> 00:24:00.689
Announcer: Scotty was the one with the big-picture idea, obliterate all the pot plants by scorching the grow site.
00:24:01.369 --> 00:24:11.909
Announcer: Later on, doll up the area with a few crosses, maybe some half-submerged fake skeletons, and of course, trails of tattered white material ensnared in the vegetation.
00:24:12.949 --> 00:24:20.389
Announcer: If Taj was involved in the Oasis pot operation, I guessed he'd be out to check on things during his day off on Monday.
00:24:20.789 --> 00:24:30.709
Announcer: This meant we had to destroy all the plants while Taj was lifeguarding and Brandon was hanging out at the Sunday celebration thing they have in Central Park.
00:24:31.189 --> 00:24:37.109
Announcer: Scotty and I danced around the grow area, merrily singeing pot plants with the weed torture.
00:24:37.569 --> 00:24:40.989
Announcer: It was a lot more fun than either of us ever anticipated.
00:24:41.969 --> 00:24:47.849
Announcer: To my complete disappointment, Taj showed up right on schedule Monday afternoon.
00:24:48.449 --> 00:24:52.269
Announcer: I'd been hunkered down in a laurel shrub playing games on my phone.
00:24:52.689 --> 00:24:58.789
Announcer: This particular laurel had oversized pink blooms that kept brushing against my face.
00:24:59.229 --> 00:25:06.829
Announcer: The Oasis is only about a mile from Gecko's Gulch, so I walked rather than trying to find a place to camouflage my ATV.
00:25:07.349 --> 00:25:12.789
Announcer: Thinking he was alone, Taj boldly navigated the path to the hidden pot patch.
00:25:13.389 --> 00:25:20.289
Announcer: I didn't dare take a photo, but the look on Taj's face when he saw what we'd done was priceless.
00:25:20.829 --> 00:25:29.129
Announcer: His shock was such that he didn't even make a sound, just took one look and crashed through the vegetation back the way he'd come.
00:25:29.549 --> 00:25:33.049
Announcer: Okay, my worst nightmare was just confirmed.
00:25:33.629 --> 00:25:37.809
Announcer: The boys were either smoking dope, dealing dope or both.
00:25:38.329 --> 00:25:48.869
Announcer: Predicting Taj would return that night with Brandon to surveil the damage, I hustled back to Gecko's Gulch, returning with my SUV crammed with ghosting goodies.
00:25:49.349 --> 00:25:56.649
Announcer: It took the remainder of the afternoon to set up the Day of the Dead decorations, topped off with the creepy corpse bride.
00:25:57.049 --> 00:26:01.689
Announcer: I kept the bride in a spare bedroom at Gecko's Gulch until we were ready to use her.
00:26:02.089 --> 00:26:08.209
Announcer: The thing was so sinister, I screamed out loud when I passed by it heading to the kitchen one evening.
00:26:08.669 --> 00:26:18.349
Announcer: Wanting to ensure the boys were free to go to the Oasis that night, Scotty claimed he was attending a birthday party for one of the doctors at the Naval Base Hospital.
00:26:18.769 --> 00:26:20.629
Announcer: Rudy was dropped off with a sitter.
00:26:21.049 --> 00:26:28.089
Announcer: Scotty didn't leave Legacy Grove until nearly 8 o'clock, which meant the lighting would be perfect for our little haunting.
00:26:28.609 --> 00:26:36.229
Announcer: We put a small glowing orb at the foot of our gloomy bride, ensuring she would be viewed in all her see-through glory.
00:26:36.769 --> 00:26:41.789
Announcer: Huddled together behind my favorite Laurel, we waited, giddy with excitement.
00:26:42.389 --> 00:26:44.809
Announcer: We were there for a long time.
00:26:45.449 --> 00:26:50.909
Announcer: Just when I was ready to call it a night, we heard the distinct rumble of an ATV.
00:26:51.629 --> 00:26:52.609
Announcer: Showtime!
00:26:53.329 --> 00:26:54.969
Announcer: They came with flashlights.
00:26:55.569 --> 00:26:58.829
Announcer: I shouldn't have been surprised by this, but I was.
00:26:59.669 --> 00:27:03.469
Announcer: Quick, I said to Scotty, turn off the light for the Corpse Bride.
00:27:04.029 --> 00:27:06.349
Announcer: Too much lighting might spoil the effect.
00:27:06.849 --> 00:27:10.929
Announcer: Better to let them discover the weird wire apparition on their own.
00:27:11.569 --> 00:27:15.489
Announcer: I have never heard such blood-curdling screams.
00:27:15.969 --> 00:27:17.869
Announcer: They shrieked in harmony.
00:27:18.449 --> 00:27:21.289
Announcer: Brandon playing tenor to Taj's alto.
00:27:21.809 --> 00:27:24.109
Announcer: Our scorched earth setting was working.
00:27:25.129 --> 00:27:29.749
Announcer: It only took a few seconds before their flashlight illuminated our ghost bride.
00:27:30.309 --> 00:27:34.149
Announcer: It was so eerie, even I was a little spooked.
00:27:34.969 --> 00:27:36.469
Announcer: Get out!
00:27:37.229 --> 00:27:40.209
Announcer: Who in the blue fuck said that?
00:27:40.869 --> 00:27:43.809
Announcer: And what was that god-awful stink?
00:27:44.469 --> 00:27:46.329
Announcer: Brandon dropped his flashlight.
00:27:47.069 --> 00:27:48.869
Announcer: Taj continued screaming.
00:27:49.449 --> 00:27:50.749
Announcer: Scotty was crying.
00:27:51.569 --> 00:27:54.089
Announcer: Something was terribly wrong here.
00:27:54.709 --> 00:27:56.269
Announcer: And that's when I saw her.
00:27:56.709 --> 00:27:59.209
Announcer: A ghastly green image of Blue.
00:27:59.829 --> 00:28:03.669
Announcer: My first thought was, Blue doesn't know boo about ghosts.
00:28:04.069 --> 00:28:05.949
Announcer: How could she possibly be one?
00:28:06.589 --> 00:28:09.769
Announcer: This was replaced by a very practical panic.
00:28:10.349 --> 00:28:17.409
Announcer: We needed to clear our props out of the oasis before these kids gathered their wits and came back during the day.
00:28:18.049 --> 00:28:22.309
Announcer: By then, there would be nothing left except blackened soil.
00:28:22.889 --> 00:28:29.789
Announcer: Later, alone in bed at Gecko's Gulch, I began to wonder if someone else had joined our little haunting.
00:28:30.189 --> 00:28:31.769
Announcer: Perhaps Boyd Fletcher?
00:28:32.369 --> 00:28:37.949
Announcer: He was forever lurking around these parts, sure that something diabolical was afoot.
00:28:38.609 --> 00:28:41.209
Announcer: Straight up asking him wasn't an option.
00:28:41.709 --> 00:28:44.589
Announcer: All that would do is tip him off to my suspicions.
00:28:45.229 --> 00:28:47.489
Announcer: That's when I remembered the thumb drive.
00:28:48.329 --> 00:28:50.789
Announcer: Unable to sleep, I plugged it in.
00:28:51.489 --> 00:28:53.429
Announcer: It wasn't what I expected.
00:28:53.949 --> 00:28:56.809
Announcer: But then nothing with Blue ever is.
00:28:57.489 --> 00:29:08.829
Announcer: Her intense interest in Juniper Hollow had led me to believe she was back to writing ghost stories, perhaps to atone for the epic failure of a novel she wrote called Spook.
00:29:09.329 --> 00:29:19.389
Announcer: I flipped through the first couple pages on the thumb drive, surprised to see that Blue was penning a biography about Delfina Fletcher, Boyd's grandmother.
00:29:20.049 --> 00:29:25.409
Announcer: Apparently, the old gal wasn't quite the saint that Boyd had made her out to be.
00:29:26.149 --> 00:29:32.849
Announcer: Scrolling through the text, it became evident that Delfina was as ensconced with the mob as her husband.
00:29:33.309 --> 00:29:42.209
Announcer: She didn't have a direct role, but her impact was evident in a number of ways, one of them being her ability to evade the authorities.
00:29:42.969 --> 00:29:45.689
Announcer: Sometimes, she was used as a lookout.
00:29:46.229 --> 00:29:50.149
Announcer: In other cases, she helped hide people, alcohol and money.
00:29:50.669 --> 00:29:59.209
Announcer: I was also surprised to learn Delfina was a master draftsman, helping design much of the grand house that once stood on the property.
00:29:59.749 --> 00:30:05.369
Announcer: Juniper Hollow was loaded with hidden caches, similar to the ones in Legacy Grove.
00:30:06.349 --> 00:30:15.529
Announcer: The manuscript seemed to advance a theory that Delfina was somehow able to escape the men who violently extracted payment from the Fletcher family.
00:30:15.949 --> 00:30:19.569
Announcer: If that was the case, where was Delfina's body?
00:30:21.429 --> 00:30:24.589
Announcer: What happens when cats and polygamists collide?
00:30:25.229 --> 00:30:28.649
Announcer: Find out in Quirky Cat Goes Splat by Adele Park.
00:30:29.329 --> 00:30:34.849
Announcer: Prance through quirky polygamist country with Skitters the Cat as he raises holy hell.
00:30:35.589 --> 00:30:37.189
Announcer: Quirky Cat Goes Splat.
00:30:37.629 --> 00:30:39.769
Announcer: Get it today on audible.com.
00:30:47.009 --> 00:30:53.029
Announcer: Let's talk pets, every week, on demand, only on petliferadio.com.